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According to the Joint Custody Association

According to the Joint Custody Association, Los Angeles, California — In BONA FIDE SEXUAL ABUSE CASES:

– The mother will generally be upset, secretive and embarrassed.

– The child will be fearful and timid in the presence of the abusing parent.

– The description of abuse will be consistent, real and serious.

– The mother will express remorse for not protecting the child sufficiently and will be willing to consider other explanations.

– The mother will be willing to have the child interviewed without her presence and will be concerned about the impact on the child if the child testifies.

– If the allegations cannot be verified, the mother will be willing to let go of the investigation as long as the child’s well-being can be monitored.



– The mother has a need to tell the whole world, expressing no shame.

– The child also wants to tell the whole world.

– The child is comfortable in the presence of the accused and may even scream the accusations in the face of the accused parent.

– Descriptions of abuse often have preposterous scenarios.

– A mother who is primarily interested in attacking the father will insist on being present when the child is interviewed, and prompt the child.

– The mother will be eager for the child to testify at all costs.

– The mother will shop for other professionals to verify her suspicions.

– The mother will involve the child in multiple examinations.

– The mother will demand that the investigation continue, regardless of the impact on the child. (Joint Custody Association) (articles on SAID Syndrome by Blush & Ross and others).


Borderline Personality Disorder:

According to Code 301.83 of the Diagnostic & Statistical Manual IV (DSM-IV), universally used by psychiatrists, Borderline Personality Disorder is “A pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image and affect, and marked impulsivity beginning by early childhood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by at least five (or more) of the following:

– Frantic need to avoid real or imagined abandonment

– A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation (Everything is defined as either good or bad with no shades of gray in between.)

– Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self

– Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g. binge spending, sexual promiscuity, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)

– Recurrent suicidal ideations, gestures, threats, or self-mutilating behavior

– Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g. intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and rarely more than a few days)

– Chronic feelings of emptiness

– Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g. frequent displays of temper or recurrent physical fights)

– Stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms Projection, a common psychological occurrence among BPDs, often results in Parental Alienation, a form of emotional abuse in which the spouse suffering from BPD turns a child against the non-borderline spouse.

This both reinforces the BPD spouse’s delusions and encourages the child to make unfounded allegations against the non-borderline spouse–a major cause of false sexual abuse charges in divorce cases. Many borderlines foster false DV (Domestic Violence) charges against their non-borderline significant others, “ex-parte,” based on mere statements of fear of threatened harm! Since symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder can be similar to those associated with other serious disorders such as depression, paranoia, obsessive-compulsive disorder, bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, panic attacks, substance abuse and eating disorders, diagnosing the condition depends on observing patterns of behaviors, thinking and relationships over an extended time period, confirmed by psychometric testing.

About Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): (resources on Borderline Personality Disorder, including links to related sites) (article by forensic psychologist Deirdre Conway Rand, PhD) (another article by Dr. Rand)



1. Why has the number of child sexual abuse cases grown so rapidly in the past 25 years?

2. What percentage of child sexual charges in divorce cases are ultimately found to be unfounded?

3. As a matter of legal strategy, why would an estranged wife want to use false sexual abuse charges in a divorce action?

4. But wouldn’t the trauma to the child of giving false testimony against a parent be reason enough to make this strategy unthinkable?

5. How are “anatomically detailed” dolls used to bolster false child sex abuse charges?

6. How have child protective laws and no-fault divorce contributed to the increase in child sexual abuse allegations against fathers?

7. What should a man do first when he learns that his estranged wife is charging him with abusing their child?

8. What percentage of true child abuse incidents are perpetrated by the child’s mother? By her new boyfriend or other acquaintances?

9. How can mental health experts help courts distinguish between bona fide and fabricated charges of parental sexual abuse?

10. How can tests like the polygraph and the penile plethysmograph help defend against false sexual abuse charges, and how much do they cost?

11. Are there states where testimony by psychological experts supporting the wife’s false accusations are admissible, but experts supporting the husband’s innocence are not?

12. Even if sexual abuse allegations are ultimately found to be false, what does it cost the falsely accused spouse in terms of money, emotionsand reputation?

13. Is this a “men’s issue,” or do male litigants in divorce court also make false abuse charges against their spouses?

14. How did you become so vitally interested in this subject that you have devoted your career to helping defend against false abuse charges?

15. How long did it take you to write ELUSIVE INNOCENCE?